A Clear Pool

Whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me. It's amazing how greater creatures than ourselves can do such wonders. A sinner that goes before God can have all his sins forgiven, pardoned even. And afterall, are we not all sinners, merely of lesser and greater degree? When your enemy walks into a church, prays, and turns to you to say, "Now God has forgiven me for everything I did to hurt you." That's when you might appreciate such sentiments in the most extremity. And if you are a greater man than me that extremity is of gladness, joy and happiness, "Thank you, God, for forgiving this man when I could not!" How wonderful! Cry, rejoice, sing! But let's be real for a moment. We are sinners, aren't we all? We do not necessarily feel such benevolence and peace as divinity. And when such a man comes before me they are not repentant, to me they are a fucking coward and a liar. You went to God, an imaginary thing, because you could not look ...

In fairy tales the prince wakes the cursed princess with a kiss... I don't even want to delve into that symbolism further, but that resistance is about as strong as my resistance to you. Maybe it is about as genuine. I'm not allowed to dream of fairytales, I have to tell myself all the time. But it isn't that hard to remember, because the world has never looked like one. It just looks like one tragedy after another, really. In real life, the princess always dies. Everything is slow poison. All consumed through senses, all consuming that person who is so thoroughly consumed. To such a glutton, tolerance is merely ignorance to the nature of one's succumbing to the poison that is living. I didn't want to think about these things. I didn't want to remember those things. I didn't want to view the world in such a way, and you laugh saying, "You mean, as it is?" It seems cruel, but perhaps the shard in my eye is again transforming beautiful things...